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Happy Canada Day, eh!

1st July 2006

Happy Canada Day, eh!

For unaware readers, Canada Day is the celebration of the anniversary of the formation of the union of the British North America provinces in a federation under the name of “Canada” on July 1st. This year marks Canada’s 138th birthday. Happy birthday to us…
Here are twenty-five signs that you might be Canadian:

  1. You know all the words to “If I had a million dollars” by The Barenaked Ladies, including the inter-stanza banter between Steven and Ed.
  2. You understand the phrase “Could you pass me a serviette, I just dropped my poutine on the chesterfield.”
  3. You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
  4. You drink Pop, not Soda.
  5. You dismiss all beers under 6% as “for children and the elderly.”
  6. You don’t care about the fuss with Cuba. It’s a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars and no Americans.
  7. You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
  8. You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
  9. You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
  10. You can do the hand actions to Sharon, Lois and Bram’s “Skin-a-marinki-dinki-do”.
  11. You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada. You make a mental note to talk about it at work the next day.
  12. You brag to Americans that Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion & Mike Myers are Canadians.
  13. You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the missing ‘u’s from labor, honor, and color
  14. You know what a touque is, eh!
  15. You design your Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
  16. You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced “Zed”.
  17. Your local newspaper covers the national news on two pages, but requires six pages for hockey.
  18. You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road work.
  19. You know that when it’s 25 degrees outside, it’s a warm day (You also think -10 C is mild weather).
  20. You understand the Labatt Blue and Molson Canadian commercials.
  21. You know how to pronounce and spell “Saskatchewan”.
  22. You perk up when you hear the theme song from “Hockey Night in Canada”.
  23. You are in your first year of university and not a “freshman”.
  24. “Eh?” is a very important part of your vocabulary and is more polite than, “Huh?”
  25. You actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all of your Canadian friends! Then you send them to your American friends just to confuse them!

One Response to “Happy Canada Day, eh!”

  1. e-Mom Says:

    Very funny, Tyler! I am a Canadian ex. pat. and I love these. Sorry… yes, I did defect, and now I live south of the 49th parallel. (The what?). Happy Canada Day to you too.